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2023 Audacy, Inc. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Its great to hear that things are going well for you now. I wonder what psychotherapy he has tried. A good place to start is the Facebook group Live Through This. I understand completely. It gives me a good opportunity to dispel concerns that others may have, too. Here I thought I just occasionally drank too much. And they did for the Hollywood stuntmans attempt to sail off the Golden Gate Bridge on Feb. 6, 1948. I live with a higher purpose now, but prior to my children I went through hell and constantly entertained the thought of killing myself. My passion for helping suicidal people stems from my own lived experience with suicidality and suicide loss. His passing causes lots of pain, sadness and changed others lives entirely. Sometimes, life just sucks and the pain of living is unbearable. Berkeley. News. West, 19, disappeared on a foggy San Francisco morning, around 6:45 a.m. to 7 a.m. Wednesday, Sept. 30 on the Golden Gate Bridge. He recovered physically, but mentally he is now depressed and on anti-depressants,has anxiety attacks, is too emotional for working, and keeps saying he wishes he had succeeded with his attempt as he feels a burden to everyone. I often think that if we are going to make up what we tell ourselves about our future, we might at least make it good. After the war, people were looking for entertainment in 1940's San Francisco, but TVs were not yet common in homes, public hangings were history and the 49ers hadnt joined the NFL yet. And these different medications can be combined at various dosages. Sydney West - Disappeared The footage taken by Guzman didn't make the news, but was watched by a small, select group: the San Francisco coroners jury, which quickly ruled a case of accidental death from drowning a week later. The San Francisco Police Department's tip line can be reached at 415-575-4444. T he Golden Gate Bridge is one of the top suicide sites in the world, surpassed only by the Yangtze River Bridge in Nanjing, China.People have jumped off of the bridge for nearly as long as it's been accessible to the public; the first recorded suicide a World War I veteran suspected to have suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder took place less than three months after the . You cant will people to live. She tried to take her life when I was 12. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Public File for KBCW-TV / KBCW 44 Cable 12. Theyre asking anyone "who may have been walking, biking, running, who commute over the bridge particularly Wednesday mornings at that time" to share information if they might have seen West or anything that can help locate the missing teen. What, Im supposed to carry on with the HOPE that things MIGHT get better. The attempt was no cry for help. About his dads suicide, your article helping me a lot to help. Look at life this way Instead of allowing a human being to be a target almost like a bomb dropping on ringed target Simply flip the idea of all the violence and fear over..Draw a Large Heart then several hearts within Make a plan for dreams and plans Stick to it .. [This comment was edited, per the Comments Policy. My failure as a person was responsible for my extreme step. It was a serious, intentional attempt to end my own life. The four-second fall from the Golden Gate Bridge sends a person plunging . That changes things. I wanted to distance myself from it as much as I could so that people would leave me alone. It was in 1984. Pandora And there ended Rhodes four-years-in-the-making attempt to wow crowds and find fame by jumping from the bridge into the bay. She was struggling with depression for years. He published the results in an article titled Where Are They Now? "No detail is too small," said her mother, Kimberly West. It is important to note that there has been no activity on her phone, bank accounts, or social media accounts since Sept. 30. My brother did the same in 2002. ive suffered depression for Years, 2 suicide attempts in 2008. Yes I know this fear of failure as well. The tragedy of suicide is indisputable. Kevin Briggs - Wikipedia Since Sept. 30, there has been no activity on her phone or credit cards. I hope you will read it and take its words to heart. Find Sydney West: Bay Area college student missing for nearly 1 year It is always wonderful to hear from someone who made it out to the other side. What We Get Wrong About the Golden Gate Bridge Suicides Family of Sydney West, missing UC Berkeley student, renews search :A Follow-up Study of Suicide Attempters fromthe Golden Gate Bridge.. How could I have been so stupid? Your pain matters. But I have. My reason to live is so I dont hurt people who care but what if you have no one who cares there was a time I had no one it was only my stupidity that got the hospital aware of my attempt. Dayna. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. The longitude and latitude for the Bridge location is approximately: N 37 Degrees, 49 Minutes, 8.0 Seconds --- W 122 Degrees, 28 Minutes, 40.6 Seconds. She was last seen in the area around 6:45 a.m. Footage in the area, according to a website the family recently set up in light of her disappearance, was blocked by fog and morning haze. When I will be talking to him, also sure helps me to see I am suicide attempt survivor. If you enjoyed this article, subscribe now to receive more just like it. Rhodes press agent, Susan Todd, told reporters that Dusty had painstakingly calculated the speed of his fall, how he would hit the water and other details, as he did when he prepared for his movie stunts. After he was rescued, he continued to live, and lives still, serving as a suicide prevention advocate at the national level. 2021 CBS Broadcasting Inc. All Rights Reserved. Her disappearance was every parents worst nightmare. Precious few people survive such a fall; the water about 200 feet below acts the same as concrete when a person lands on it at high speed. Sydney West was last seen near the Golden Gate Bridge in the early morning hours of Sept. 30, walking near Crissy Field. Missing Ex-Cal Student Last Seen On Golden Gate Bridge Anyone interested in following the investigation may do so on Facebook or Instagram, and tag posts with #FindSydneyWest. suicide sometimes defies even the best efforts to thwart it, University of Denver Graduate School of Social Work, http://www.SpeakingOfSuicide.com/resources/#immediatehelp, If Only: Self-Blame After a Loved Ones Suicide, You Cant Do Everything: Limitations in Helping a Suicidal Person, a meta-analysis of numerous studies that looked at bridges suicide barriers, Generally, research into method substitution, 10 Things Not to Say to a Suicidal Person. Someone mustve seen something nothing is being ruled out. Her family has stated that she enjoyed the area around the Golden Gate Bridge, and it was not unlike her to take pictures and go for a walk or run. West returned to the Bay Area as a University of California, Berkeley student, where she studied until recently, San Francisco police said when she was first reported missing. I recently lost a good friend to suicide. West was born in Walnut Creek and lived briefly in Castro Valley before her family moved to Pleasanton. It was the last thing Dusty did, and it was a failure, she said. Parenthood does not protect everyone, though. He jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge and survived. Now, he's - CNN Indie Pop Star Michelle Lambert Kicks Off the Bankhead Courtyard Concert Series! I am so glad my attempt did not end in my death. (findsydneywest.com) West was last seen on the morning of Sept. 30 on the iconic bridge. I blame myself 100% for her suicide. Children are a major reason for living for many people who battle suicidal thoughts. Search within r/redsox. We dont like living in pain, and we look for ways of ending that pain and, being creatures of habit, we do it in old familiar ways because thats what we know. The Jumpers | Psychology Today I am very sorry for your loss. Berkeley when she went missing on September 30, 2020. They then examine the demographic characteristics of those who commit suicide from the bridge as well as the fatal attraction of the Golden Gate Bridge. Getting through them is the way to make your life your own again.. This research, though 35 years old, still holds true. Additionally, Hines takes medication and . Interviews with jump survivors and potential jumpers . Thanks for sharing your story here. West was in the Bay Area to take summer classes at UC Berkeley; she was supposed to enter school in the fall, but due to a concussion she sustained and classes being held remotely, she opted to defer for another year but stayed in California with family friends. But the cameras lost sight of her because of heavy fog, making it impossible to know what happened. It is believed that she had moved out of the dorms into an apartment with some friends near campus. I am a survivor as well of rape and spousal abuse, Am feeling empowered today, thanks to you. Im not sure that preventing suicide is such a noble act. I know there will be a lot of people out there who will think a certain thing happened to Sydney. I hope he is seeing a psychiatrist for his medications, not a PCP, because psychiatrists are much more well versed in the benefits, risks, side effects, etc. West may have been wearing dark leggings, blue Vans shoes and a teal sweatshirt at the time of her disappearance. Sydney is considered at risk due to depression, said SFPD Officer Robert Rueca to KRON4. In fact, Dusty told his friend to shoot from the bridge as it would be more dramatic, and besides, he would easily be able to swim to shore to a congratulatory, awestruck crowd of beach goers. Email: joshua.bote@sfgate.com and Signal: 707-742-3756, Six months after student's disappearance in San Francisco, family continues search, Horoscope for Saturday, 3/04/23 by Christopher Renstrom, Snowboarder dies at Tahoe ski resort following historic blizzard, West I-80 closed near Tahoe due to snow and 'multiple spinouts', Wife of Jeffrey Vandergrift issues somber update, Even Salesforces tower HQ isnt safe from office cuts, Inside Harry and Meghans favorite In-N-Out, Horoscope for Friday, 3/03/23 by Christopher Renstrom, Massive Lake Tahoe waterfront compound slashes price by $20M, This beloved East Bay hybrid cafe and bike shop is closing, Ja Morant says he'll get help after video shows apparent gun. Trackback URL Rhodes also made the news in 1946 on a radio program called Truth or Consequences in which he was bizarrely tasked with living on a traffic island on the corner of Hollywood Boulevard and La Brea for three weeks. Holidays and milestones come and go while we continue to feelSydney's absence continuously. If your child will play baseball or softball this spring, youll need to stock up on appropriate clothing and equipment. According to her family, a private investigator has followed up on dozens of tips, but none have led to West's whereabouts. But what about people like me? Car plunges off California elevated highway, 3 people killed. This Walking Pad treadmill made getting 10,000 steps a How to get tickets for Depeche Mode's new tour dates. So, I have two choices: Miraculously stop all self harm and suicide attempts, or have to make sure they are 100% successful, because I cant stand the thought of long term in patient. West, 20, grew up in Pleasanton, Calif. She was a star volleyball player at Foothill High School and loved singing at open mic nights. The family of Sydney West is offering a $25,000 reward for her return. Anyone with information is asked to contact private investigator Scott Dudek at (925) 705-8328 or Dudek.associates@gmail.com. For example, he may be telling himself that the way he feels and is now is the way he will feel and be forever. My sons father committed suicide and in the moments he was alive after shooting himself he kept saying sorry I shouldnt have never done this over and over. . Anyone in the Bay Area with any information regarding her disappearancecan contact Sgt. Sydneyhas not used her phone, social media or bank accounts since she disappeared. Dressed in a blue sweatshirt, leggings and Vans slip-on sneakers, the 19-year-old college student last contacted her family the day before with a lengthy phone call to her dad, Jay West. Had medical intervention on the second. I guess I have started to realize its not my faultits no ones fault when a loved one commits suicide. Try convincing someone like me that life is worth it. As of 2013, it is estimated that 34 people have survived after jumping. Im sorry to hear about all the pain youve been through. Jumpers | The New Yorker (felt good to be honest for once). I find myself returning to that time in my life and wondering if this is the way Im supposed to go, or if the survival instinct will continue to win. For his big ticket to stardom, Rhodes was inspired by a circus performer named Frank Cushing who was plucked out of the bay the previous year after claiming that he had just leaped from the bridge, though no one was there to see it. I am suicidal have been for the past week. Sadly, your post is being used by some commenters to justify the Golden Gate Bridge net boondoggle. Despite having to raise two young children alone with barely a cent to her name, Lorraine refused many offers from news agencies to sell the film of her husbands demise. West's parents are asking anyone who may have been commuting or exercising on the bridge to come forward with anything they may have seen. Simply put unless you die the battle won or pain doesnt matter. I feel if I constantly feel like this over the years why dont I just die now? Even though 2/3 are started by women, Virtually every article is written by women. My overdose gave me seizures. Wishing you peace, I am both, not realizing this until reading today My dad ended his life by his own hands , when I was 9. In 2013, Briggs retired from the California Highway . Sign up for free Patch newsletters and alerts. Another possibility is that the instinct to live kicks in once someone comes close to dying. What do you tell the ones who still perceive they have no one how do I get through to him? Good luck to you, Joan. He had a gun in the house that he never used, was trying to sell, I didnt even think of it during this time. I tried commiting suicide and ended up brain dead Then after I got out of the coma, I was put in rehab for 11 months where I kept trying to break my neck and die because I missed my fiance so much (he wasnt allowed to visit me because he had attempted suicide with me too since he didnt want to live without me). Written forwww.speakingofsuicide.com. It amazes me that the vast majority of suicides are by men, and virtually all of the articles about it are by women. Its a really simple concept. I agree with you completely, Anonymous. And the children are adults now. Thank you. Your email address will not be published. West's family urges anyone with information about the case is asked to contact Scott Dudek, their investigator, who can be reached at 925-705-8328. Thank you for reaching out to Joan and offering your support. The corpse was pulled from the water by the Coast Guard a mile from the bridge 20 minutes later. On the morning of September 30, 2020, Sydney took a ride share service to the Golden Gate Bridge, where she often went to jog, practice yoga, and exercise in nearby Crissy Field. He already had refused to get help or to stop drinking. The memoir Half in Love: Surviving the Legacy of Suicide captures very well, to a painful degree, how someone who deeply loves their children can simultaneously feel pulled to end her life. Theres people who love you and want you to keep pushing even if your soul reason is living to not put them through that heartache. "This will be the biggest jump of my life," he told her. She was last seen wearing a light teal hoodie, dark leggings, and slip-on vans sneakers with dark green and black print. Wests parents said they have now hired a private investigator who is working with the San Francisco Police Department and Orange County (North Carolina) Sheriffs Department. But then they are stopped from jumping. West had just gone off to college to her dream school, University of California Berkeley. "Jump." That's the word Kevin Hines heard in his head on September 25, 2000, as he stood on the Golden Gate Bridge. What % of those people were financially ruined (ie dead broke) with no job or no home? Thank you for contributing to the discussion. Come home.. Throughout the years, Ive engaged in self-injurious behaviors. He completed the challenge and won himself a taxi ride to New York. I am not sure anybody really wants to die but I know many people, including myself, who are just sick and tired of living and want it to be over. Of the 515 people whose attempt was interrupted, only 35 later died by suicide in the years to come. Others need to respect the decision. I love to see that in the Comments section; I find it beautiful when people can connect in this way and, even more, when someone can tell another person what they havent believed for themselves. I used to believe my problems are so intractable that the only way out of my pain was suicide. At the time, a made for TV movie, named Silence of the Heart came out. 1998 - 2023 Nexstar Media Inc. | All Rights Reserved. and the evidence around them is not good. At this point, the instinct is what keeps me living. : The Fate of Suicide Attempt Survivors, A Follow-up Study of Suicide Attempters from. I am literally living day by day and full of guilt, regret and anger. Previously, police said she had not been seen or heard from since before dawn, on Sept. 29. Sydney Kaitlyn West, 19, was last seen near the Golden Gate Bridge around 6:45 a.m. on September 30, 2020. It's not hard to kill yourself at the Golden Gate bridge. If you want to talk with someone immediately by phone, text, or chat, please check out the Resources page. similar to cancer ads, etc. Especially when its an opinion so your both right. and our Lets get real here life sucks and its hard but dont give up. Edit: FAQs https://findsydneywest.com/faq, https://www.pollyklaas.org/missing-children/sydney-west/, https://pleasantonweekly.com/news/2021/09/30/what-a-week-find-sydney-west, https://www.kron4.com/news/bay-area/searching-for-sydney-san-francisco-police-still-asking-for-publics-help/?fbclid=IwAR2uVE3anCjr5EvpUerTiD6JZxCAENR83-xIRz3TRzAfRuGckyYFzRqnobM, https://storiesoftheunsolved.com/2020/11/27/the-disappearance-of-sydney-west/. I use to hate her for wanting to leave me, got diagnosed w depression at 15 have done so many therapy sessions. Why Prevent Suicide? Although severe depression led him to jump off the bridge, Kevin Hines has stated: The very second I let go, I knew I had made a big mistake.. Note: I wanted to make this post to hopefully create some sort of discussion around the case since it was almost a year and a half ago. All theses years following, I did not feel good about myself, am reunited with my nephew, reading up on how to talk to him. Also, on the Resources page, I list a number of websites and other resources for people who have lost someone to suicide. Im wondering if youve seen the post If Only: Self-Blame After a Loved Ones Suicide. Clad in two suits, weighted boots, football padding, another rubber suit and a football helmet that onlookers described as giving him a man-from-Mars look, Rhodes also had three parachutes on his back to ease his fall. Your message here is a good one. Such an assumption would be wrong. The Oscars will air on ABC and can be streamed on ABC.com and the ABC app as well as Hulu + Live TV, YouTube TV, AT&T TV or FuboTV. The instant regret of jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge did not result in instant mental health recovery once Hines survived.